Today's Snippet

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Monday, 12 May 2008
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED
No matter how hard you try, you can't baptise cats.

When your mum is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair.

If your brother hits you, don't hit him back.  They always catch the second person.

Never ask your 3 year old brother to hold a tomato.

You can't trust dogs to watch your food.

Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.

Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a tic tac.

Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time.

School lunches stick to the wall.

You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.

Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.

INTERESTING MASONIC FACT
King Solomon's temple was destroyed by Nebuchadnezzar, King of Babylon in 588 BC, 416 years after its dedication.

The whole city of Jerusalem was levelled and the inhabitants carried off as slaves.

Although the temple was burned and pillaged, the deep foundations remained, and were the site of the housing for the Knight's Templar.

OXYMORONS
A paradox reduced to two words, usually in an adjective-noun (eloquent silence) or adverb-adjective (inertly strong) relationship, and is used for effect, to emphasise contrasts, incongruities, hypocrisy, or simply the complex nature of reality.
   act naturally
   found missing
   liquid gas
   deafening silence
   seriously funny
   living death
   microsoft Works!
   virtual reality
   awfully pretty
   pretty ugly
   almost exactly
   head butt
   genuine imitation
   hell's Angels
   same difference
   larger half
   serious vanity
   bitter sweet
   army intelligence!
   jumbo shrimp
   Work Party
   acute apathy
   authentic replica
   alone together
   baggy tights
   cold sweat
   doing nothing
   even odds
   half empty
    seriously funny
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'Mr Snippet'

Script by William Bontrager